my stomach was twisted in knots as we checked, double checked, and triple checked (probably quadruple and quintuple checked, but I lost track) our trip booking. it stayed in knots for a good hour after we clicked the “complete transaction” button, too! it just feels like so much money right now… I mean, I trust God, but apparently I hyperventilate less when I feel slightly more financially secure. this is obviously a personal problem.

in any case, I kinda decided that we can’t try to jump from happily-ever-after to happily-ever-after, we have to actually live the stories… yes, novel, I know. perhaps I shall add that to our “we so profound” page, lol. seriously, though, it’s crazy what a thousand here and a thousand there will do to your sense of security… it’s like I trust God to come through for us, but I just like him to have a bit more of a cushion for his time frame before we are completely destitute you know, don’t want him to get stressed or anything, lol.

so when it felt like he really wasn’t giving us super clear leading in one direction or the other about going to Costa Rica, I was seriously tempted to flip a coin. if they could use lots and the urim and thummim in the Bible, it only seems fitting. but I just have the niggling feeling that the Holy Spirit replaces that stuff, and then I feel like an idiot for not feeling like I’m getting it in this situation…

eventually we just kind of went off of the vague sense we got of knowing that it would be a lot more “life-giving” to us right now to go than to stay. refreshing, refocusing, etc. I tell you, those what-ifs really mess up your head sometimes, though. we certainly could have continued to wait and see if we got a better direction, but we felt we waited right up till basically the last second in this situation with someone else waiting on our decision. so we trust in Proverbs 16:9

so there you go, the very unscientific, illogical, and tentative way we reached a decision. adult life is so complicated. and I surely do wish I was asleep right now. I have had a good 3.5 hours of sleep so far, though, so I should be good to go, right? my brain is ridiculous sometimes. I will have to wait until morning to actually post this, though, because I don’t even want to try to make this look right from the tablet.

let’s see, what kind of picture can we throw in here? =)

I could post this one of David tinkering with the espresso machine at Kalona Coffee House…

or this one of Maeve in the little boat she came up with this week – funny girl

or this one of Maverick’s current “smile!” face

as it turns out, I’m thankful for all three! and the crazy journey we are on together…

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!